London Bridge is falling Down

ok so i have all these half finished draft posts about my times in Morocco and Ireland and Toronto but then i was like....i must write about my night in london first!


So I am obesseeeeeeed with London and England in general. I am part of the commonwealth and their aristorcrasy, tea, wars and writers have always fascinated me. I want to marry someone Britis. The accent makes me horny, baby. (Austin Powers reference thank you very much)

So I decided to book my flight into London from Toronto and the last train out to Brussels at 7 30 pm. So at least I would get to spend the afternoon in London and catch a glimpse of stuff.


After my bajillion hour flight, which wasn't too bad because they gave out inflatable travel pillows which made my journey 50% better (get one now, they make sleep possible)

I landed in Gatwick. And after an hour going through customs, baggage figuring out how the hell to get into London, I was on my way.


Except the Tube station is going through serious construction, so I had to change trains like 3 times before Kings cross where I planned to leave my luggage.


Brutal crowds! And not fun with my suitcase(which , as you will see later, I am MADLY in love with my father for buying a good quality suitcase)


London is huge and the tube system is vast and it made my head spin. Loved it.

So I arrived at Kings Cross, my muscles already aching at about 2 pm.

I was ready to go home and do London another time but they wouldn't move my ticket.

So I went to the LEft Baggage place and found out that each item left was 6.50 GPB. For those who are mathematically challenged (except in the areas of money conversion and tax, I am too) For my 2 bags that would have been 26$!

I refused to pay 26$. Dammit. That is like a dress or a return trip to Brussels from Leuven 6 times.

Yes. I know I am a cheap idioit. Did I really want to be dragging aroud my suitcase and backpack for the next 5 hours?

Ahem. Apparantly my jet-lagged mind though it worth it.

Soooo I hopped back on the Tube to Picadilly Cirus. I walked randomly, no idea where I was going. I went through China Town, the Theatre Distict and found myself on a huge shopping street.

I though New York was bad.

Londoners LOVE to shop. THey are all Shop-o-holics, I can see why the book was placed there. I blame it on having to wear uniforms in their formative years.

Gazillions of people just walked in and out of stores laden down with bags from Seldfridges, Primark, Topshop. It was my kind of place.


So I walked and browsed and people watchd didn't buy anything.

But then it hit me.

They had Primark!

If I had written a proper Irish post, you would understand that significance, but Primark is the ultra cheap store with tonnes of cute shit. And they had the holy grail of tights, 3 for 2 GPB. Tights are 15$ in Toronto and 7 euro in Belgium.

I had to get them. I hate doing laundry, and I wear tights almost every day. So I went on a hunt.

Primark was bustling. The lines where literally wrapped around the cash register. And they have this cook system in London for cash registers where a voice goes " Please come to number 5" sometimes it says "Please come to number 17".

So orderly those brits....

A Technologically advanced ticket system.

So I bought my tights, had to pay by credit card (which meant it probs cost the same anyways) cuz my Maestro Card wouldn't work (not a type its my euro debit card).


Then I realized it was 6:40 and I had to go catch my train!

So I hopped on a bus. Which was double decker. Which 5 years ago I would have been so excited But I have become quite blase about everything european. Then realized I was going the wrong way. But I met a Canadian girl from Toronto on it. Who was TOTALLLLy Jewish.

So I chased down the bus across the street. Which was moving so. slowly. 10 munites in the same spot.

But the driver wouldn't let me off! And then I started crying ebcause it was 7:15...and you are supposed to be there 30 min before... and it left at 7:30...


Can you say 'fucked"?

So he finally let me off the bus because I was crying and I ran WITH ALL MY BAGGAGE still to the nearest tube station.

Did I mention I had been dragging my luggage with me for FIVE hours???? How did the wheeels not break? I have no idea. I was tearing up in the station but then I saw a man begging whose entire body had been burned off. And then I stopped crying and whacked myself for being so bloody spoiled. So I ran through the tube station, switched lines, got to Kings Cross ran to the Eurostart ticket office...and MISSED THE TRAIN.


I was a little emotional at this point. The point of being jet-lagged, no sleep, been wheeling around a suitcase around a strange land for 5 hours and just missed the last train of the day can't afford a hotel kind of emotional.

So I bawled to the nice ticket man. He tried to calm me down and told me I had indeed missed the last train to Brussels and would have to spend the night in London. Then he told me it was 50 GPB for the train in the morning. COuld I afford it? um NO I mean, I had a credit card, but not enough money in the bank. He then told me that "he just had to ask but he wouldn't charge me for it".

BEST TICKET MAN EVER. I am in love with the ticket operator. in love.

Except I still had no where to stay. I couldn't sleep in the station becuase it closed and the hotels started at 25 GBP. (50$)

All I had left was my one day travel card.

What the fuck..who needed sleep anyways? I dragged my luggage on to the first bus I saw, first scoping out if there were any 24 McDonalds (there weren't)''

I hauled my shit on top of the double decker bus and rode around London.


Then the Bus driver kicked me off at the last stop.

So I hauled my ass on the next bus I saw.

Until the bus driver kicked me off.

I saw wonderful things, millions of people on the streets, buildings, Arab Town, Posh town.

I really needed to pee then ( I not taken out a dime the entire day but just kept going to Marks and Spencers for water and sandwhiches on my Maestro Card)

Then, as I was running away from the washroom attendant lest she make my pay 20P that I didn't have, this young male Aussie asked me if I needed help with my bags. I said I didn't but I had been carrying them for 5 hours, blah blah blah told him the whole story then he invited me for a drink with his mates.

Sure? What else did I have to do.

Which is how I found myself partying with 10 Aussies.

This would also be more significant if I had published my post about what I think about Aussies.

We (and my luggage) traversed to a bar, where they actually let me and my luggage in without a second glance. I could have been hiding a bomb in there...or alchol.

I had just taken out 10 quid form a Cash Point (Translated from 10GPB from an ATM) and so stuffed my shit in coat check for a pound.

Londenors sure know how to dress up. Their fashion is so ah..unique and they put efford in it. I got to talking with one Aussie who wouldn't tell me his age but had an actual job as an an accountant. I'm guessing 27. ( How come I never hang out with anyone my own age?)

Then we talked for so long all his friends had left, so we followed them to another Indie bar.
I stopped on the way for a beer and chugged down a polish brew which a Brit in the Off License had recommended.



The bouncer here also paid no attention.

They had anime projected onto the wall in a basement. It was very cool. So I danced in my super inapproite outfit (brown unisex am ap cardi over a black tank top with black thermal am ap leggings and black slouchy tough boots) but maybe they thought i was going for a 'im so cool I don't even have to try" look instead of the actual "I haven't slept and have traveled across the atlantic in airplane comfy clothes"

So I just chilled and drank (one aussie bought me a magners) and then got invited to spend the night at the Aussies student house. Then I woke up at 6am and walked to the tube station where i made my train.


fucking jelagged now.